Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
