He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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