I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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