You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
