can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I have feelings that need drinking.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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