I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize