you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize