Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
