and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
