Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
