i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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