I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
