I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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