So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
