I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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