you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
