you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
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