Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
