it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize