Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
