Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
