I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
