Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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