He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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