I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
