apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
