Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
