I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
