I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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