the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
