that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
