do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
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