Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
