i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I just googled if crying burns calories
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize