So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
we're making bets on your personal life
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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