I wanna bring you to show and tell
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
