don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
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