Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
This is the high leading the old right now
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
