plz talk dirty to me
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
