im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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