is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize