don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
