So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
