Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
