hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
