just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
