There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize