There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
