At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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