Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
