Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Randomize
