After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
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